What to do with two weeks until the wedding

Two weeks to go…top 20 wedding checklist (FYI: IT’S ALL MARKETING!)


Yes. I’ve read about five million of these this week. Lists and lists of things I should’ve been doing over the last three months, 6 months or year, to physically prepare myself for a day which is billed to be more gruelling than running a marathon. Afterall, you can probably train for one of those in half the time.

Apparently, with two weeks until the wedding I should’ve got my botox out of the way by now (each to their own, but WHO thinks it’s a good idea to freeze your capacity for facial emotion the week before your wedding?!? And you know botox is from botulin, like one of the most deadly poisons ever, right? Okay…if you’re sure…) I should’ve had my hair cut a couple of weeks ago. I should be planning my massage and scheduling my manicure and pedicure. I should be preparing to fake tan.

pizza oven


I’m not FYI.

Have you ever noticed that, funnily enough, no one is telling you what real things you should be preparing for? Oh, like being legally bound to someone for the rest of your life? Appreciating the joy coming to you in waves from friends and family? Blah, I know, I could go on, and I’m sounding self-entitled and horrible already. Of course we all want to look our best. Of course I want to feel proud of my body, face, hair, all of it.  But I’m GETTING MARRIED. Fundamentally, no one cares. They’re here to celebrate me getting married to the person I love!

Magazines have products to promote. Those checklists are probably even sponsored by a supplier. I’ve been looking through all this stuff, only to come to the conclusion that what matters is that I’m prepared enough to enjoy the day, whatever that might entail for me.


SO just to be hypocritical, I’m letting you know my To Dos, but with the proviso that these are MY priorities, and that yours are probably different, and you shouldn’t feel the pressure to do everything everyone is wittering on about – just do what’s right for you!

So, still on my To Do list:

  1. print my order of ceremonies (inside and out)
  2. print luggage labels as place names
  3. write 90 jam labels for the favours
  4. finalise my plans for flowers (to do the Weds and Thurs before the wedding on the Friday)
  5. have a hair trim on Monday
  6. make SURE I don’t need a yellow fever jab for the honeymoon (fear has reared its ugly head)
  7. buy different herbs to use as themes for each table
  8. get some dollars for the honeymoon
  9. keep note of the donations towards the honeymoon coming in as wedding gifts
  10. buy a nailpolish that goes with my wedding dress but will be long-lasting
  11. find time to epilate
  12. find time to have a posh bath, with lovely bubbles and a face and hair mask
  13. try to strictly keep to the 5:2 diet for the next 2 weeks
  14. make a list of everyone bringing cakes, and thank them, and make sure I have enough stands/plates
  15. work out when to wash my hair for optimal hair-do efficiency
  16. whittle our favourite 8 hymns down to the 5 we need for the service
  17. practice walking in that weird, two-step bridal way to the music I’ve chosen
  18. work out how I’ll do the boutonnières
  19. print the seed packets we’re using as favours too
  20. exfoliate and moisturise well every day, and have a good cleansing routine using my poshest face products
  21. Do Shaun T’s insanity fitness religiously so I feel strong and my arms aren’t flobby when I wave

In reality, I think there are probably 50 things I need to do, but off-the-cuff, these are my top 20 priorities right now.  Some of them are crucial, and some of them are less than silly. And I’m sure the fiancé’s list will be at least 50% different to this!  My point is, we all have different priorities. If you don’t usually fake tan, and you and your partner hate the smell, why bother now? You don’t usually wear fake lashes? Then why blink through your wedding day like Daisy the cow under heavy lashes?

I guess my plan is to try to facilitate me being the best me I can be on the day – but me, nonetheless. Why be a random, perfectly bronzed, lashed, made-up, hair-coiffed woman? That’s not who your partner fell in love with!!

the edible woman

Is anyone else preparing for a wedding and struggling with all the traditional dos and don’ts? Have I missed anything crucial?! (Seriously, tell me now, I have two weeks to fit it in!!) x




Let me know what you think